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Pipe DreamsShe hates to read but loves to write
She's peaceful but she tends to fight
Scared of the dark,she adores the night
Scribbling poetry by a dim flashlight
Buried under blankets and sorrow
And would it be wrong,if she held back tomorrow?
With memories held to her chest,
clung to like a worn out teddy-bear
And when she closes her eyes,
She can't see
The pain surrounding her
Agoraphobic,she longs to travel
Too scared to do more than dream
She'll run away someday,she swears
When pigs can fly and dead men scream
That's when she'll free herself,yes
WritingI can't write
My brain fights
Every little rhyme I try to type
Every idea I have,my mind will wipe
Away like words in the sand
Blown away by a gust of wind,and
For every line I'm forcing out
One drop of rain falls to end the drought
Yes,my head kind of hurts
But I can write
RememberRemember the night
You hit me,
And said I'd amount to nothing?
Remember how I cried
And when mommy saw my bruises,
I did what you told me to
That's what good little sisters do
And then remember the day
You were the one to cry?
I'll never forget the way
You begged me to lie
Swear to her you fell
Oh,you prayed I wouldn't tell
And I didn't
Our secret.No one needs to know you're a loser,just like me
Remember how you ruined my childhood,
And remember how I never told?
Well,being the victim has gotten old
HumanShe's a geek,freak
I hate that girl
And she's so stupid and lazy
She's schizophrenic,and did you see the way
She looked at that other girl today?
Yep,she must be gay
She hears new insults every day
Piling them on,carrying them around the way
One might carry heavy luggage
She smiles through it all like she doesn't care
But behind the mask she wears,there
Can you see it?
She's just like you
Coming OutI've spent too long
Living with this repression
Acting as if nothing's wrong
And fear turns to aggression
That wasn't me before
I learned how to fake it
But that's not me anymore
And this lie,I can't take it
This is going to hurt,but I'm strong and I'll make it
All this time,I've been faking perfection
And if by baring my flaws
I will lose your affection
Then so be it
Facing RealityIt's hiding who you really are,because the people who love you most
Wouldn't love you so much if they knew the truth
It's watching new wounds form over long closed scars
Because old hurts always come back to haunt you
And the people who hurt you before
Always come back for more
It's when you're living a lie
And no matter how hard you try
You can't change the fact that
You aren't really good enough
It's when you've given up,and finally
You look and see
You'll always be alone
Or should I call you big sister?
You would have been older than me, but you left when you were still just a baby, before any of your little brothers and sisters were even born yet
Before you were even born yet
I'm sorry, big sister, or brother, or whatever you would have been
I wish we had met, that you could have met our parents
They're nice, and they love you a lot
Mommy was so sad when you died, when her very first baby died before she had a chance to live
I'm sure Mommy cried, but I wasn't there
I would have comforted her if I had been
I would have made you proud of me
Baby, I wonder where you'd be
If you were here today
You were beautiful
Just little hands and feet
I wish I could have seen you smile
I bet it was so sweet
Hi, big sister, or brother, or whatever you would have been
I hope someday we'll meet
I'm Sorry,MommyI'm sorry that I couldn't be the perfect girl you wanted
I tried so hard to be happy,but just like you I'm haunted
And underneath the laughter and the smiles that I flaunted
I was hurting,Mommy,just like you
I'm sorry I couldn't be strong
How it hurt
I'm sorry I didn't last so long
I feel like dirt
Because I see you trying to act alright,
Act alright for me
And I know it's my fault you and Daddy fight
I'm so sorry,I'll let you be
I'll say I'm okay
Just please wipe your tears away
when you find yourself
in a crowd of familiar faces,
the struggle for breath
You Will PayI can taste the fear upon you:
The cold sweat in your palms,
The eyes that dart at shadows,
And the lips that are forced into a tightened smile.
You wait beneath the blankets,
Shivering each night as the anxiety rises.
You gasp at the slightest sounds and quiver...
For you are afraid of the curse that comes.
In your mind you see what you have done to me.
You watched as you ripped my tongue
And stole the very voice from my soul!
But even if I am without a body,
Even if I can no longer hold a knife to your throat.
Fear alone is enough for me to silence you,
And I will NEVER allow you to be heard!
Inner DemonI harbour a monster,
It lingers deep within.
It wants to escape me,
To tear free from my skin.
It gnaws at my insides,
And hopes that I'll give in.
It works hard to tempt me,
To lead me into sin.
It wants me to suffer
To feel its wretched sting.
But I stand true and strong,
I will not let it win.
The nights are the hardest,
In bed I pray and sing
To the Lord God above
To rid me of this thing.
But instead it remains,
My monster still within.
MazeLost within myself
Looking for a way out
This cannot end like this
Trapped in my own mind
A maze with no exit
I keep running and running
But I always end up
In the same place where I began
RustThe dwelling rust
swells this hollow garden
and somewhere in the yard
a tire swing goes flat
against the skyline.
It chokes the autumn light
in the silo,
the crush of
mums and ragged berries
It bubbles in the percolator
steeping still life
in the caul
of early morning -
the red-brown crumbs
of breakfast toast and jam
growing ghosts upon
And deep inside
I still hear you waking up
the soft salute
of morning voices
stirring the wind
outside my window.
Slaves of the deadSlaves of the dead
to find another land,
but they couldn't stand the desert and the frost.
Some died, some returned.
For those who returned
the masters had prepared a special punishment.
Their memory was wiped off.
They became thieves,
without ever understanding why.
They just felt it was the right thing to do.
Red Light ReduxHaving a truck
Paint me red
Is the strangest feeling
I’ve ever felt.
I’ve seen myself melt away
Like a mid-summer’s ice cream
While my personality screams
To be noticed. Every wall that once
Stood between me and reality
I am finally free.
Until they strapped me down
And sewed back my hands to my head.
My heart to my mouth.
My legs to the earth.
The taste of freedom
Rests gently on my tongue,
And I’ve been trying
To no avail.
FreeI am finally
In my abilities
You can no longer hurt me
With disgusted expressions and
Eyebrows raised sardonically
If you don't believe in me
It matters not
I believe in myself enough for both of us
And I won't be brought down by your vicious plot
To destroy me with "constructive criticism"
With smirks and words of cynicism
For years you held me on a leash
But now,out of me comes a wild beast
And from you,my best friend,I am released
Keep in Touch!
A two-time Community Volunteer for the deviantART Related category, Anne is well-known as a positive, helpful force. She is the community's resident expert when it comes to CSS (Cascading Style Sheets), and her personal gallery offers a wide variety of tutorials for new and experienced coders alike. In addition, each winter she hosts a calendar project encouraging members to create Journal designs for all to use, bringing more creativity to the community.
It is with immense gratitude that we acknowledge Anne as the recipient of the Deviousness Award for October 2014. Read More